1. Of crucial importance in relation to the development or success of something else.
2. Vitally important: critical.
As I sat on my ass in front of the TV watching the ball drop on New Years Eve, I contemplated new years resolutions. I hate making resolutions; I never stick to them. So a friend of mine suggested I use the word 'intentions' instead - the word 'intention' doesn't sound nearly as binding as 'resolution', so maybe with a little wiggle room I might actually achieve some success. I set about making a list of new years 'intentions'. I did not realize that I was about to begin an extremely pivotal and monumentally important year.
My first intention for this - the year I turned 40 - was to get into the best shape of my life. Period. Once and for all. I started out the year carrying an extra 10+ lbs of winter squishiness; and now - except for a bit of a muffin top (which I hear is common for someone who is 'my age') I have reached this intention. From here I will strive to become stronger, leaner and healthier; but I am currently in the best shape I've ever been in. And it feels amazing!
My second intention for this year was to skate 500 miles... Then 700... Then 1000. Currently I am at 867 miles skated for 2011; so 1000 is well within my reach. Skating no longer became just about the mileage goals however; I wanted to become faster and better. It has been an evolution of sorts - I can't even begin to describe how cool it is to feel the transformation of recreational skater (all gawky upright stance, arms all over the place, legs stick straight) into a more fluid and intense skater. I still have a lot of work to do but just knowing that I've evolved this much gives me the enthusiasm to continue to grow. It is an ongoing process and I love every minute of it!
My third intention was geared towards my career. I initially wanted to work to move forward within the company I'm at now. I've been here 4 years and I'm completely stagnant. I tried - believe me I tried - to get ahead but for some reason I cannot. The frustration, and the apathy, and this feeling of being STUCK has led me to decide to go back to school... I've been kicking it around for YEARS, but fear has kept me from pursuing it. About a month ago (after a particularly drab day in cubicle HELL) I made the decision, applied for admission at the local community college; and started making plans for life AFTER payroll... I am going for a Human Performance/Fitness Science degree. I want to help people get to where I am at, I want to do something that I feel passionately about. I am very excited and cannot wait to get started! After I get my A.A.S, I will sit for the Health Fitness Instructor certification. From there, I will work for 500 hours (probably doing personal training or some other type of instruction) after that I hope to sit for another certification that will allow me to work with people who have special needs; disabilities, or recovering cancer patients, or veterans; something like that. I believe that this will give me a sense of purpose and fulfillment.
Somewhere during this journey I've been taking all year - this vital, important year - I've developed some really strong self confidence. And I attribute it to the skating. See, I've always been an EPIC under-achiever. Someone who is average across the board. To see how far I've come with my skating has given me the confidence to BELIEVE that I am actually capable of doing so much more in so many other areas. I don't HAVE to be average. I'm definitely not average when it comes to inline skating; I'm pretty good and only getting better. Wow, what an amazing feeling... I feel like I can do anything, and that confidence trumps the fear... Finally. Chris -1, Fear - 0.
So here I am. 8 months into 2011. I start school next month - just one class for now. (It's been 20 years since I've taken any classes - it's probably best to start slow...) I have a plan that has me working here for one more year, then going part-time to work/full-time to school with the hopes of graduating sometime in 2014. I am on an amazing fitness journey, now I have even more reasons to keep at it; I want to be an example of practice what you preach, I mean - who can trust a fat personal trainer??
The true test will come when the weather changes, and the days get shorter, and I can't skate every day: but I don't intend to HAVE an off season this year. I have warm clothes; I figure if the sun is out and there is no snow on the ground (and it's not below 45 degrees) I don't see any reason why I can't skate. I also plan on doing some skiing/snowboarding. Why not? I bet it would be a blast... and life should be an adventure!
I skated last night. I didn't want to, I have been fighting a head cold and had a pretty bad sinus headache. The sky looked stormy. The wind was blowing. But the desire to be wheels down was too strong - I hadn't skated in a WEEK! So, I figured I'd just take it easy, do a short 10 mile roll and then head home to relax... Funny thing, once I hit the trail, my body took over. I skated pretty hard. I got rained on. I went full out for almost 16 miles and maintained a 15.1 mph average. The wind was in my face the entire way back. I didn't care - I was in my happy place. This year has been one of the best I've had in a very long time. No matter what happens; I am going to always, always treasure the way I feel right now.
(I'm still trying to make Northshore happen - I cannot WAIT to do a full marathon!!!)
You're absolutely inspirational. I've seen your ups and downs for the past 6-odd years and you're this enigma in my mind's eye. I can only hope that I can stick with my fitness goals and when I falter, I look at what you've done with your skating and where you started out and I remember that I can pick myself up and get back on the horse. Thank you!!
ReplyDeleteYou didn't even see me at my worst either: 1998 - 2004 were the darkest years of my life... I cannot even relate to the person I was then. I think as long as you truly believe in the reasons behind why you are doing what you are doing, you will persevere. I finally reached a point where I don't just dream of success; I want it to be real and I will do anything to get that.... :)
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