Taking Chances

 

 

This particular entry doesn't particularly pertain to skating. No, wait - yes it does. It does because it's about change, and making changes takes courage and confidence. Well, it just so happens that courage and confidence are two things I have gained through skating!

 

On Tuesday I handed in my resignation. I have no other job lined up, so I'm basically free falling into the next chapter of my life without a parachute. My husband gave me his blessing of course, I would never do something so drastic without his support. I've been unhappy for a very long time, ever since a sequence of events culminated in me arriving at this particular moment in time feeling completely burnt out and ready for a change. (I won't bore you with the details because I am trying very hard to let go of the negativity.)

 

I got my first payroll job in 2000 purely by chance; and I don't want to do it anymore. I don't want to sit behind a desk like the dude with the red stapler from Office Space. I want to wake up every morning looking forward to my job, not dreading it. I want to do something I enjoy, something I love - I just need to figure out what that is.

 

I would love to do something with fitness. Nutrition, exercise, etc. I love learning about it, I love sharing information and I love working with people. My hesitation comes from the disastrous experience I had in 2011 with Going Back To School.... (If you weren't reading my blog back then - basically I decided to go back for my associates degree in Human Performance...) It's been over a decade since I've taken any type of classes, I signed up for ONE class (English 101) and I couldn't even make it through the entire semester. I didn't even get to the good classes! That kind of crushed my spirits and my ambition. I know there are other ways of obtaining this knowledge and getting into this field - I just haven't fully explored them yet. But I need to.

 

2 years ago I had a moment where I wondered if I was capable of skating a half marathon. And then I took a chance; and I did it. And I gained confidence. Then I wondered if I could skate a full marathon - so I took another chance, and I did it; and I gained even more confidence. Now I'm two weeks away from running my first half marathon, and I feel stronger and more confident than I ever have in my life. Me, running a HALF MARATHON when a year ago I couldn't even run down the block... I'm scared yes - but my fear is always entwined with excitement; and I'm learning how to focus on the excitement until the fear fades into the background. I do this when I skate. I do this when I run; I will need to do this as I begin my new career path. Whatever that may be. 

 

My tentative plan is to take the month of June off - to focus on training for Apostle and clearing my head: do some research and see if I can figure out once and for all what I want to be when I grow up - before I'm retirement age....